TOMORROW.


So, now as it's 11:45 at night, I am WIDE awake and excited because TOMORRROOOWWW I get to be reunited with my favorite kiddos in the whole world and I cannot wait. Come, well, probably 4:00 in the afternoon tomorrow, I will be at East Florence Mission getting ready for them to come running (and slowly walking/skipping/hopping/whatever kids do) through the doors. I am finishing up review questions for after the lesson, making sure we have enough sheets for hopefully enough kids, and overall just getting excited. I have been praying for the past 2 months that this would be a great year at EFM. I am praying that God will open the minds and hearts of some of these kids who have been here for a long time.. but who I don't think know Jesus. I am praying for me, the little white girl who they all love and are secretly scared of, to make a difference in their lives this year. I am yearning to be a light in some of their very dark worlds. I don't know how exactly to do that. I can follow this lesson plan book to a T but, for most of them, that won't make any impact on their lives. I am scared and frightened because I am in charge and being looked up to. But I am also inspired, and confident because I know that God is on my side. He has some huge plans for these kids. I am just thankful to be involved in those plans. When I started their back in 9th grade I don't think I had any idea just how much I would become involved. I am so thankful that God has me where He has me. I was thinking back today on the early days. Back when I was new at EFM, and I didn't teach any lessons, and I sat back most of the time and observed. Crazy. I am now teaching almost every week. I consider myself friends with most of those kids. Of all ages. I am lovingly referred to as "Miss Alana" by my little ones, and "AAAllannnnnnnnnaaaaaaa" by my big ones. You have to pronounce it a certain way. These kids have grabbed ahold of my heart without even realizing it. I came across this awesome quote from pinterest a few weeks ago, and I now have it hanging up in my bathroom. I'm not sure if it's based off any specific scripture, but it just seems to inspire me every time I read it.
"I am deeply loved, 
 divinely appointed,
 abundantly equipped, and
 profoundly cherished by 
 God. 
 No enemy plan, scheme,
or obstacle can keep me 
from God's highest and 
best will for me. 
As I follow the voice of 
my Savior,
I see the invisible,
accomplish the impossible,
and love the unlovable."
-Susie Larson

In case you didn't pick up on my favorite part of the quote (hint: look for underlined, bold, larger part), it's "As I follow the voice of my Savior, I see the invisible, accomplish the impossible, and love the unlovable." It fits my goals for EFM this year. As I follow my Lord and Savior by doing what He wants me to do, which I believe is teaching these kids, I hope to do these things. See the invisible by letting them all know that to me and more importantly to God, they are individually special and loved. Accomplish the impossible by letting them know that God has an incredible, miraculous plan that involves them. Most of them don't believe that. Love the unlovable. Doesn't that speak for itself? We have so many kids that misbehave, in school, at home, and at EFM. But that doesn't mean they aren't loved. There are a few that are hard to get along with. Some of them don't want to be there, but mom or dad or brother/sister make them come. Does that mean they shouldn't be loved on? No. God's perfect plan has these kids there this year. 
Two more things. If you occasionally listen to 89.7 or my new fav, 92.5 than you might have heard the song "Start a Fire" by Unspoken. I feel like it fits. 
"Start a fire in my soul
Fan the flame and make it grow
So there's no doubt or denying
Let it burn so brightly
That everyone around can see
That it's You, that it's You that we need
Start a fire in me

You only need a spark to start a whole blaze
It only takes a little faith
Let it start right here in this city
So these old walls will never be the same

 Over and over again
I hear Your voice in my head
They need to know
I need to go
Spirit won't you fall on my heart now"

 I feel like it says perfectly what is on my heart now. One more thing.
PLEASE pray. Pray for me tomorrow. I am scared and worried and nervous, even though I have done this whole teaching by myself thing for two years. Pray for my kids. I love them. And God loves them more. Pray for them to realize that.
Thanks for reading my incredibly long, grammatically incorrect, just the way I like it at 12:28 blog post. 


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